Beth Ditto - a former housemate, who unfortunately bore a more than striking resemblance to the lead singer of The Gossip. A friend named her T-Bone for her stark diet consisting of T-Bone steaks and mashed potato.
Eyebrows - I've briefly mentioned him before, mainly for his annoying habit of wiggling his eyebrows during oral sex.
Elbow - my first ever boyfriend. He was 16 years my senior, which put him very close to the age of 50. He was given the horrible nickname of "Elbow" by friends (not that he ever heard it) because someone surmised that his "old balls would feel like the dry skin on your elbow". I did my own comparison on him one night. They felt nothing like my elbow skin. (Confess - your feeling your elbows right now)
Whore Lip - this is a horrible nickname for someone who I still talk to quite a bit, but she gets really really bad cold sores on her lips. Anyone that's seen American Dad will get the reference.
The Slapper - I was this woman's team leader for a couple of years. The first day I arrived she had the nerve to tell me that she was much more qualified to do my job but decided to give someone else a chance to do it. That kinda set the tone for many months of hell in managing this chick. She was also massively overweight, and had a bad habit of wearing dresses that were way too short for her. She had bad body odour and the day she perched herself on my desk I almost passed out from the smell.
Tumbleweed - a certain manager in this place who only blows in during the quiet times and blows right out the other door.
Moley - another boyfriend, and this guy just had so many moles on his face so it was an obvious choice. On his ears, on his lips, on his back, arms, legs, chest, hands. He used to use solariums quite regularly, so I was quite concerned about the melanoma risk. He just wanted to be tan, even though he was South American and already had a great skin tone. He was also known as the hairdresser, as, um, he is a hairdresser.