Best key word search ever...

Some one found my blog with the following Ggoogle search;

"Since I stopped drinking I seem to have a rash"

Doctor Benji recommends you start drinking again to see if it goes away.

It's Complicated...

So I met a man.

We went on a date.

It was nice, very nice. No bedroom shenanigans. Just a quick peck on the cheek and the promise of another date in the near future.

So three days later we meet for another date. Yes it was fast, but he made all the moves. And once again, very nice. I got boozy on wine and started to get very touchy, so I took him to a gay bar where we made out like teenagers for hours.

He dropped me home, we did something naughty in the car, but no bedroom shenanigans again.

Then the man goes overseas for two weeks. He emails me every day. We share, we learn.

This is looking to be promising.

The man finally returns home, and we meet up as soon as possible, at his insistence.

He certainly knows how to push my buttons.

Date three was spectacular. Nothing more can be said.

Really... could this be going somewhere?

The next morning, he rolls over in bed and comes clean about his ten year relationship that he doesn't plan on ending any time soon.

I still went on the fourth date.

Idiot.

FAIL!!!1!

...or is it a win?

Hmmmm.... shiny

I bought a new laptop... it's supposed to inspire me to write some fantastically witty posts (well its supposed to make writing easier if I don't have to hold in the charger to make the fucking thing work).

But in the week I've had it...*nothing*

Sigh.

But I did make an interesting choice not to transfer across my iTunes account to my shiny new laptop. Well I started to, but only 300 songs got transfered before I got sick of the old heap of shit turning off on me.

So that's left a little hole in my collection of close to 4000 songs.

Fuck.

So of the remaining people that actually might read this post... I need so suggestions to repopulate me decimated iTunes library.

So far I've gone a bit spastic with classic Smashing Pumpkins, found some great acoustic Lady Gaga and Boys Like Girls, reacquainted myself with some screaming System of a Down, and remembered how much I loved Machine Gun Fellatio at Uni.

You get the idea... I have a far reaching taste in music. So throw me some ideas of some great new, old or down right embarrassing music that I must get my hands on.

Extra points if you manage to avoid mentioning Mariah Carey/Whiteny Houston/Celine Dion (yes I looking at you Mr Skyhooker).

I might write a new post one day...

But it won't be today.

Blogging is hard....

So here's a picture of a clam....

Just a little bit of clam talk for your morning cereal...

Oh Fifi.... you are a spastic.

So it was unintentional.... but any woman that can slip the C-Bomb into breakfast TV deserves my applause and ever-lasting adoration.

Australia's Got No Talent...

Lets get things straight. Australian Idol shits me to tears. Wannabe singers destroying great songs (and a huge number of shitty songs too) all in an attempt to garner a craptacular record deal that will be absolutely worthless and provide no longevity in the music industry (hello Casey Donovan, medical receptionist).

The fact the Kunty Kyle Sandilands managed to get his sizable arse fired from the show did nothing to excite me this year. It was just bound to be the same shit every Sunday night until the 17 year old Hill Song devotee is announced as winner.... boring.

Then they announced the new judge last night. Mr Jay Dee Springbett;

Wow. The ex-pat pom, R&D man for Sony BMG London is my type of man.

Baldy head? Check!

Nice and tall? Check!

Hot accent? Check!

Penis? Um, hopefully check!

That's all I need really.

He apparently is on the chunkier side of hunky (40 inch waist....meh), and is a dedicated family man (bugger), but I think he is one hot looking guy.

He looks like a shy, non-egotistical gentleman that would buy you breakfast the next day as a thank you for the many, many, many hours of hot man sex where he does horrible, nasty, sexy things to you as he whispers filthy nothings in that hot pommie accent into your ear.

Sigh.

But sadly, even with this hotness filling my TV screen, Idol still just isn't worth watching.