Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Did it always taste like sweaty ball sack?

I attended a Christmas lunch at the local Thai restaurant with the HR department today and it was a lovely, civilised luncheon with my new team (ie - Benji didn't get trashed and vomit in the gutter).

I found it really strange that not a single drop of booze was consumed. I mean who has ever been to a dry Chrissie party for fuck sake? It's not like I was going to get tanked and go back to work and delete several hundred pays from the payroll system, but I really wanted a beer to wash down my prawn panang curry. But seeing as no one else did, I didn't want to be the naughty child and get my hand smacked.

Boring HR people.

The lunch was really nice though. The curry was perfect and had heaps and heaps of big prawns all the way through it. I had way too much when the training manager started trying to coerce me into having a dessert with her.

Fuck it. I'd already blown my calorie count on the curry, I may as well enjoy a dessert for once. So I decided to go for the deep fried ice cream with choc fudge sauce.

I haven't had deep dried ice cream since I was a kid. I remember getting it when we'd go out for a rare Chinese banquet with mum and dad's friends. It was always so crispy and coconutty on the outside, and always came with some whipped cream and a couple of lychee's for decoration and added flavour.

No matter how full I was from the banquet, I'd always make sure I'd have room for dessert.

So with those fond memories circulating through my mind, I started to salivate at the thought of my yummy yet totally unhealthy dessert. But what I got did not meet my expectations at all.

Sure it was a great big ball of golden deep fried ice cream, but it was just sitting on top of a dollop of sauce with no other garnish at all.

Presentation was lacking indeed.

Then when I got to taste it, my sweet child hood memories were completely dashed. It really tasted like a sock had been deep fried in diet cordial covered in dry skin flakes from your grandmothers stockings.

Not happy at all.

So has anyone else had a child hood memory ruined by a modern encounter? I need to know that it's not just me that has a fucked up recollection of the past.


Kezza said...

Don't worry, its not just you - just about everything I enjoyed as a kid has been destroyed as an adult, I'm not sure if thats me or the makers of whatever I wanted to indulge in but it all sucks. Wizz Fizz doesn't sting your longue like it once used to, porn doesn't thrill the fuck out of you like it once used to and smoking soesn't deliver the same terrifying headrush like it once used to, in short, being an adult is the equivalent if drinking a cup of cold sick, its only worth watching someone else do it while you stay well out of harms way.

Kezza said...

Also as an adult it appears that I've become dyslexic so just ignore all the typos in that above comment.

Andy Man said...

Bubble O Bills used to taste so great, and the best bit was you got bubble gum at the end.

I had one the other day and it was tiny, tasted like shit and the gum was a rock hard ball of shit.


jenny b said...

I used to love those long cream filled donuts with the line of red jam down the middle. I had one last week it was sooooo sweet it made me feel soooo sick.