Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Why yes, that is an erection!

I finally got around to upgrading my mobile phone.

I used to have a nice little slim-line Sony Ericsson s500i. It was a slider which had pretty green buttons and had pretty flashing lights. Not many features but I thought it looked pretty cool (if a little bit gay with the flower wall paper) . But it was on prepaid with Virgin (who have the worst prepaid deals on the planet) and the buttons were breaking and it was slowly dieing.

So I bit the bullet and went and got a new phone. On a plan even, so I don't have to worry about running out of credit after sending a million texts to the man every night. It was either gonna be an iPhone or a Nokia. I'm not that much of a pretentious wanker so I chose the Nokia N95 8gb.

While I love the features on it (great 5 mega pixel camera, great music player, and still the same easy to use Nokia menus and messaging) its the size of a fucking brick. When I stick it in my pants pocket it feels like I've got a big old clunky mobile from the early 90's in there.

Since I've put on some weight and my pants are getting a bit tight, I'm sure it makes me look like I've got a weird shaped erection when I walk down the mall. So I hold on to it instead - which looks like I'm holding a gay little coin purse.

Weird-shaped erection, or gay coin purse? I'm gonna look like a freak either way.

6 comments:

The Mutant said...

I might be falling a little bit in love with you, not for your odd shaped bulge, but because you shunned the iPhone and went with the superior N95. I'm loving mine at the moment, but I don't see a problem with the size of it, I went from the anorexic Samsung Z510 and I really don't find the N95 oversized, that may have some to do with the fact I keep my pants large, but I also have fat thighs which should negate the effect somewhat. Err, either way... Death to the iPhone and hoorah for the N95. Right now I'm going to scurry off and try to appear like a normal person

Anonymous said...

You lose all that weight.. and then you go and put on 30kg by carrying around the N95?!

Neither the iPhone or the N95 are worth the purchase.

You both should still be ashamed of your purchase!

Ben said...

Surprisingly, the N95 weighs less than my s500i. I'll still probably ruin it by accidentally washing it one day.

Crystal said...

Seriously, "dieing"???

If you're gonna blog learn how to spell.

cop that.

That said, i do find your blogs delightful, if a little self indulgent (but then what is the purpose of blogging if not to indulge ones belief that others care for our opinion).

Proceed.

Ben said...

I was about to cane your arse for questioning my spelling, but upon researching have discovered I am wrong...

Dieing - is the act of "casting a die" or a mold. Wrong usage here. I apologise.

But I didn't want to use "Dyeing" as in the act of apply hair dye.

So the correct word is "Dying" - as in ceasing to exist.

That said, you can still bite me.

Anonymous said...

I have one of these sony erricsons. Its a great phone.