Monday, August 3, 2009


I'm scared that I'm about to be made redundant.
I'm scared that any shred of a career I had is gone.
I'm scared that I've hit the 100kg mark again.
I'm scared that I've forgotten how to lose weight, and I'll never get to my goal.
I'm scared that my drinking is seriously out of control.
I'm scared that I've gained a reputation for being a sloppy drunk that chases after anything on a dance floor.
I'm scared that I'll never find a man.

I'm especially scared that in the 12 or so months since I've been blogging I have achieved sweet fuck all in my life.

I was gonna disable comments on this one. I'm scared what some of you will have to say.


Clairebear said...

Dont worry, I'm not scary.
Ive been there. Well, except substitute losing career to will never have a real career.
I have to say, I dont really know you that well, so I cant make much of a comment on a personal level, but as little as shit like this means to people when theyre in that headspace, "fear is what makes us climb higher" comes to mind when I read this.
Feel free to use me as someone to bitch at or whinge to if you like. Gav will tell you Im good with things like that.
Hope things get better.
*virtual hugs*

StevieB said...

Ha, ha you didn't disable comments.
Now I can say that your blog is witty and you have a great outlook towards your corner of the world. I look forward to reading your story.

So Ha!

Anonymous said...

Things are always darkest before the light. You know what you need. Only you can change things

The Mutant said...

Hello Lovely,

Just thought I'd let you know that I'm an expert when it comes to fear.

I'm scared I'll never look the way I want, that I'll die young, that I'll achieve nothing of any value, and so on and so forth.

You know what's great though - we all have those moments and they do eventually fuck off and die... because you are a fabulous woman. I've known you longer than your daughter... Wait. Wrong speech.

If you've got it, flaunt it dear. Otherwise you'll end up a jaded, bitter, MARRIED old cunt like me with no life, pining for 2.5 kids. Avoid that shit at all costs!

unique_stephen said...

Get of your fat arse and get the to the gym.

Anonymous said...

I'm scared that you don't see just how fabulous you are.


Anonymous said...

hahahah fuk wit

Anonymous said...

What's the bet that anonymous is a fat, unemployed dickhead who thinks that being introspective is something that can be cured with a trip to the doctor?

Yo, fuckwit, get a life.

See Ben, when you don't disable comments all the crazies come out to play

Nanna said...

Saying something would just be to easy tho..

Anonymous said...

It's trite but true - you have to go through the tough times to enjoy the good times.

Even if all your fears were to come true - you could and would deal with it. The future may not be what you currently planned - but when does life ever go to plan!

I'll step down from my soap box now. Be happy man - nothing else matters - and the rest will take care of itself!

R :)

Victor said...

Everyone has moments of self doubt.

You are intelligent and articulate and your profile photo reveals a perfectly normal looking head.

Take things as they come. You cannot control everything so just set yourself small, achievable targets. If you don't achieve them...well start again and never give up.