Wednesday, September 24, 2008

I'm starting a new diet today!

I'm starting to chunk up a bit. Since I've started seeing The Man, I've been drinking more, eating more crap food and exercising less. So with that combination of bad habits, I've put on a few kilo's over the past six weeks.

But I've discovered a new diet. The Crack Diet (tm). It has a fantastic success rate, and you simply shed the kilos. Lets look at some before and after shots of people who have had success on this diet phenomenon;

Before: Ms Amy Winehouse. Notice the curves? Notice the ample bosom? Notice the glow to her face and the distinct lack of bone visible beneath the skin? It's just not a healthy image to portray is it? But thankfully she went on The Crack Diet (tm).

After: See how much better Ms Winehouse looks? Her cheeks are now nice and sunken. Her arms look like they could be snapped simply picking up her crack pipe. I just love the way the upper part of her rib cage is visible through her skin. It's like its come out to say a cheeky "Hello boys! Aren't bones so much sexier than my former pert boobies?"

I also like how her hair has gone from a lovely shiny, clean look, to the unwashed beehive that looks like it could house several rats in it.

Soon as I find a dealer, I shall start The Crack Diet (tm) with gusto. Fingers crossed it's the diet solution for me.


Kezza said...

The crack diet sounds like a complete lifestyle solution, and with results like that you'll be looking totally hot (or almost dead, I always get those two confused) in no time, let me know if it works, I'm dying to try it!

Anonymous said...

Holy crap she was pretty good looking bgefore the drugs. How old is that photo?

jenny b said...

I like her music, but she is so messed up now. Id hate to be that skinny